In these dark days, I would like nothing more than to bring light to your life by telling you all the amazing things in this movie, but I don’t want to spoil it, so I will only tell you a few things. There are prison guards who make the mistake of shooting the Rock with rubber bullets—rubber bullets that the Rock returns. Robot cars take over Manhattan! Submarine?? Car racing! Computer hacking, which is like car racing for fingers! Charlize Theron as a James Bond villain! Kurt Russell crackin’ jokes! Ludacris and Tyrese, also crackin’ jokes! The deadly glare of Dame Helen Mirren. Russia (timely). Michelle Rodriguez Michelle Rodriguezing it up! The spine-chilling phrase “Dominic Toretto has just gone rogue.” (I know.) A single glittering tear that trembles down Vin Diesel’s cheek and grants immortality. A shocking secret involving a BABY? by Erik Henriksen